Sunday, July 24, 2011

Saw this online and had to borrow it...

Things You Wish You Could Tell Non-Horse People
1. A Pony is NOT a Baby Horse

2. There is a distinct difference between being Bucked-off and FALLING-off

3. Trotting is NOT the same thing as Galloping

4. The horses in the field are NOT blindfolded

5. The horses in the field laying in the sun are NOT dead, they're just napping

6. Jumping is not what you see in the old western movies

7. You cannot just throw a saddle on ANY horse, and expect to ride it

8. Yes it IS hard to ride a horse, no it does NOT do all the work and NO you don't just SIT THERE

9. Yes, in the wild horses didn't live in stalls, wear blankets or get their feet trimmed, but they also did not do dressage or jump 3' with an extra 180# on their backs.

10. There's a difference between galloping for fun and being run away with.

11. Just because my horse is a boy does not mean he is a stallion.

12. Kicking a horse in the ribs and yelling "YAAAHHH" isn't the appropriate way to start.

13. An awful lot of the big names in the movies actually couldn't really ride that well. The horse deserved his own award for tolerance.

14. I'm 23. I have a degree in equine science. I'M NOT GOING TO GROW OUT OF IT. ITS NO LONGER JUST A PHASE!

15. In real life, horses do not whinny constantly like they do in the movies.

16. She's not "white", she's a grey.

17. No, he will not automatically kick you if you walk behind him.

18. Not *all* horses are either Beer Horses (Clydesdales) or Race Horses.

19. Just because you are a good rider doesn't mean you no longer need a trainer.

20. Not ALL baby horses are COLTS! Girl horse babies are called FILLIES!

21. Getting a pony and keeping it in your backyard for the kids is not a good idea.

22. The nails in shoes are NOT sticking into the 'feeling' part. They horse really can't feel the nails. I promise.

23. Rearing is not cool.

24. just because you have children, and I have horses, does not mean that the two groups shall be joined together, EVER.

25. No, these full chaps are ONLY used for riding horses, and no, I won't wear them in the bedroom!

26. ALL chaps are Butt-less. If they had a butt, they'd be leather pants, wouldn't they?

Monday, July 11, 2011

Is it fall yet?

We've not done much riding these days.  We spend most of our time beside the pool and in the gym instead.  It's so stinkin hot.  I miss camping and hanging with my friends.

Cory, my MIL, and I at one of her swim meets
My mom surprised Cory with a visit

Playing with my new camera

Cory shows me her dive

Fun times with friends and family

My little fishy

Me & my mom

Hubby & mom

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Got this in an email and had to share

Long but well worth the read...

What took you so long in the restroom?  (This is hilarious!!)


When you have to visit a public bathroom, you usually find a line of women, so you smile politely and take your place.  Once it's your turn, you check for feet under the stall doors.  Every stall is occupied.  Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the woman leaving the stall.

You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter, the wait has been so long you are about to wet your pants!  The dispenser for the modern "seat covers" (invented by someone's Mom, no doubt) is handy, but empty .  You would hang your purse on the door hook, if there was one , but there isn't - so you carefully, but quickly drape it around your neck, (Mom would turn over in her grave if you put it on the FLOOR! ), yank down your pants, and assume "The Stance."

In this position your aging, toneless (God I should have gone to the gym!!!) thigh muscles begin to shake.  You'd love to sit down, but you certainly hadn't taken time to wipe the seat or lay toilet paper on it, so you hold "The Stance".

To take your mind off your trembling thighs, you reach for what you discover to be the empty toilet paper dispenser.  In your mind, you can hear your mother's voice saying, "Honey, if you had tried to clean the seat, you would have KNOWN there was no toilet paper!"  Your thighs shake more.

You remember the tiny tissue that you blew your nose on yesterday - the one that's still in your purse . (Oh yeah, the purse around your neck, that now, you have to hold up trying not to strangle yourself at the same time). That will have to do. You crumple it in the puffiest way possible. It's still smaller than your thumbnail.

Someone pushes your door open because the latch doesn't work.  The door hits your purse, which is hanging around your neck in front of your chest , and you and your purse topple backward against the tank of the toilet.
"Occupied!" you scream, as you reach for the door, dropping your precious, tiny , crumpled tissue in a puddle on the floor, lose your footing altogether, and slide down directly onto the TOILET SEAT.  It is wet of course.

You bolt up, knowing all too well that it's too late . Your bare bottom has made contact with every imaginable germ and life form on the uncovered seat because YOU never laid down toilet paper - not that there was any , even if you had taken time to try.

You know that your mother would be utterly appalled if she knew, because, you're certain her bare bottom never touched a public toilet seat because, frankly, dear , "You just don't KNOW what kind of diseases you could get".

By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is so confused that it flushes, propelling a stream of water like a fire hose against the inside of the bowl that sprays a fine mist of water that covers your butt and runs down your legs and into your shoes. The flush somehow sucks everything down with such force that you grab onto the empty toilet paper dispenser for fear of being dragged in too.

At this point, you give up.. You're soaked by the spewing water and the wet toilet seat.  You're e-x-h-a-u-s-t-e-d.  You try to wipe with a gum wrapper you found in your pock! et and then slink out inconspicuously to the sinks.  You can't figure out how to operate the faucets with the automatic sensors, so you wipe your hands with spit and a dry paper towel and walk past the line of women still waiting.  You are no longer able to smile politely to them.   A kind soul at the very end of the line points out a piece of toilet paper trailing from your shoe. (Where was that when you NEEDED it??) You yank the paper from your shoe, plunk it in the woman's hand and tell her warmly, "Here , you just might need this".

As you exit, you spot your hubby, who has long since entered, used, and left the men's restroom.  Annoyed, he asks, "What took you so long, and why is your purse hanging around your neck?"

This is dedicated to women everywhere who deal with a public restrooms (rest??? you've GOT to be kidding!!).  It finally explains to the men what really does take us so long.  It also answers their other commonly asked questions about why women go to the restroom in pairs.  It's so the other gal can hold the door, hang onto your purse, and hand you Kleenex under the door!

A Friend Is Like A Good Bra...
Hard to Find...
Comfortable ...
Always Lifts You Up...
Never Lets You Down, or Leaves You Hanging,
And Is Always Close To Your Heart!!!